SATYAMAVE JAYATE

From: Swati [mailto:taurean@airtelmail.in]
Sent: Sunday, August 24, 2008 12:49
To: Sanchita Majumdar; Shivani; Ajay Grover; Dimple Mahesh Tahil
Subject: MEN..satyamev jayate

Q: What is the difference between men and puppies?
A: Puppies grow up.

Q: Why do men always have a stupid look on their faces?
A: Because they are...

Q: What do men have in common with ceramic tiles?
A: Fix them properly once and you can walk all over them forever.

Q: If you drop a man and a brick out of a plane, which one would
hit the ground first?
A: Who cares?????.....

Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: I can do better than this! And then he created woman!!!.

Q: What's the difference between an intelligent man & a UFO ?
A: I don't know, I've never seen either.

Q: What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
A: i) no mind ii) no business

Q: What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
A: The same urge that makes dogs chase vehicles they have no
intention of driving.

Q: What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift?
A: Exchange him!!

Q: Why do men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract.

Pass this on to some women who need a laugh..
and to men who can handle it! !

Women and God

A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.


While on the operating table she had a near death experience.


Seeing God She asked "Is my time up?" God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live." Upon recovery,


the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a Facelift, liposuction, and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair color.


Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it. After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home,


she was killed by an ambulance. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 years? Why didn't you pull me from out of the


path of the ambulance?"



(You'll love this!!!)
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God replied,


I didn't recognize you."

MUMBAIKER-HILARIOUS

Very Interesting. ......... ........
Once a man went to a Veterinary Doctor and said, ' Doctor, I have come on vacation for a month so that I can get myself treated fully within this period'.
Doctor : I think you should go to the Doctor opposite to my clinic, see that board.
Man : No, Doctor, I have come to you only..
Doctor : But gentleman, I am a Veterinary Doctor. I am an animal specialist. I do not treat human beings.
Man : I know, Doctor very well and that is why I have come to you only...
Doctor : I can not, because you speak like me, think like me, talk like me which means you are a human being and not an animal.
Man : I know I am a human but listen to my complaints first.
Doctor : OK. Tell me.
Man : I sleep like a dog thinking about my work load whole night.
I get up in the morning like a horse
I go to work running like a deer
I work all the day like a donkey
I run around for 11 months like a bull without any holiday.
I wag my tail in front of all my bosses
I play with my children like a monkey if I get time.
I am like a rabbit before my wife
Doctor: Are you FROM MUMBAI ?
Man: Yes
Doctor : Instead of telling this long history you should have told me in the beginning itself that you are FROM MUMBAI . Come man, no one can treat you better than me.
--

PRESENCE OF MIND

>
> In a shop a man asked for 1/2 kg of butter. The
> salesperson, a young boy,
> said that only 1kg packs were available in the shop, but
> the man insisted on
> buying only 1/2 kg. So the boy went inside to the
> manager's room and said
> 'An idiot outside wants to buy only 1/2 kg of
> butter'. To his surprise, the
> customer was standing behind him. So the boy added
> immediately, 'And this
> gentleman wants to buy the other half!!!!!!'.
>
> After the customer left, the manager said 'You have
> saved your position by
> being clever enough at the right time. Where do you come
> from?' To this the
> boy said, 'I come from Mexico. The place consists of
> only prostitutes and
> football players!!!!!'
>
> The manager replied coldly, 'My wife is also from
> Mexico'.
>
> To this the boy asked excitedly, 'Oh yeah? Which team
> does she play for?'
>
> Presence of mind help, never panic!!!!!!!!

2 Moons on 27th august

27th Aug the Whole World is waiting for......... .... Planet Mars will be the brightest in the night sky starting August. It will look as large as the full moon to the naked eye. This will cultivate on Aug. 27 when Mars comes within 34.65M miles off earth. Be sure to watch the sky on Aug. 27 12:30 am. It will look like the earth has 2 moons. The next time Mars may come this close is in 2287. Share this with your friends as NO ONE ALIVE TODAY will ever see it again.

__._,_.___

Don't miss the Chance,

2 Moons on 27th august

27th Aug the Whole World is waiting for......... .... Planet Mars will be the brightest in the night sky starting August. It will look as large as the full moon to the naked eye. This will cultivate on Aug. 27 when Mars comes within 34.65M miles off earth. Be sure to watch the sky on Aug. 27 12:30 am. It will look like the earth has 2 moons. The next time Mars may come this close is in 2287. Share this with your friends as NO ONE ALIVE TODAY will ever see it again.

__._,_.___

Don't miss the Chance,

ALL FAMILY MEMBERS SHOULD READ THIS ESPECIALLY CHILDREN

DEAR ALL MUST READ FOR ALL

ALL FAMILY MEMBERS SHOULD READ THIS ESPECIALLY CHILDREN!

These crooks are getting very good!

A lady has changed her habit of how she lists her names on her mobile telephone after her handbag was stolen.
Her handbag, which contained her mobile telephone, credit card, purse, etc., was stolen.
Twenty minutes later she called her husband, from a pay telephone telling him what had happened.
Her husband said, 'I have just received your text asking about our pin number and I have replied a little while ago.'
When they rushed down to the bank, the staff told them all the money was already withdrawn.
The thief had actually used the stolen mobile telephone to text her husband in the contact list and got hold of the pin number.
Within twenty minutes he had withdrawn all the money from their bank account.

Moral of the lesson:
Do not disclose the relationship between you and the people in your contact list.
Avoid using names like Home, Honey, Hubby, Sweetheart, Mom, Dad, etc.,
And very importantly, when sensitive information is being asked for through texts, CONFIRM by calling back.
Also, when you are being text by friends or family to meet them somewhere, be sure to call back to confirm that the message came from them.
If you do not reach them, be very careful about going places to meet 'family and friends' who text you.

PLEASE PASS THIS ON.

I never thought about THAT!
As of right now, do you have 'home' named on the mobile?